*ya mampus gantengnya kamu, nak! ^___^;;*

salahkan teman teman kantor yang asyik mengikuti turnamen itu yah. hmmm, pertama kali kepincut pemain tennis kayaknya sebelum masuk SD, sama Bjorn Borg pemain idola saia sepanjang masa. tapi yang bikin gue nyoba belajar tennis sama bokap di lapangan BI Pancoran sih Stefan Edberg, jagoan kalem sing lembah manah lan bersahaja. tentu saja tidak sukses, secara ngga suka lari lari pontang panting kepanasan padahal belum masup stadium napas perokok tuhh. terakhir kali kepincut sama Goran Ivanisevic , si muke dingin yang kalo serve kecepatannya lebih dari 200km/jam menurut majalah Tempo apa Intisari ya *gue aja ngga pernah nyetir sekenceng ini, tak tau kalao si inang metro ye*.

lantas tiba tiba pikiran disegarkan si manis bermata biru membuat hati berdebar debar bibir tersenyum lebar. uhh, sebenernya ngiler basah total si. jum'at sore sudah tidak mood kerja, tv arcade diganti jadi star sport yang menayangkan semifinal Hewitt-Roddick yang menyenangkan. editor editor boleh belain Roddick tapi gue secara birahi langsung milih Hewitt. biar kata akhirnya kalah di final sama Marat Safin tetap aja hati tak berpaling *cecece crut crut ciwiiiw*. aih mati berdiri nggak kira kira. gue paling nggak bisa liat cowok ganteng, rambut semi-gondrong, rahang bagus, mata tajem, body stallion kek gini. huhuhu, edan. maennya ekspresif agresif lagi. laki banget laki.

cuman plis de, lahir taun '81. berondong kali. sini sun tante sini. wakakakakaka.

no-one on earth could feel like this
i’m thrown and overblown with bliss
there must be an angel
playing with my heart

There Must Be An Angel Playing With My Heart - Eurythmics

will it be yes
or will it be
...sorry?

Paula Cole - I Don't Want to Wait

these suspenses and thrills are killing me...

hummm, anggap aja ini permintaan maaf terbuka dari gue buat si moron yang secaranya baru menyadari panggilan kesayangan dari gue yang tidak proper seperti propeller. tapi plis de, perasaan gue udah manggil elu "SAWAH" dari jaman sma gitu loh. bareng ama alm. Topik, remember? but if you insist, yoh wes kita bikin sukuran di BurPet sekalian gue mao trakteer elu dan pak menejer. tapi namanya bole tambo ciek yo? Sawah Sumoron, phaps? xixixixi. ei, poto poto kemaren keren lo, jeng... tengkyuuu...


*cecece dije-wannabe abiss... *

ngomong ngomong nama, ada yang mesti selametan juga keknya lantaran namanya di hi-jack orang. sabar ren, dia anaknya emang gitu. tampol aje ren, tampol. mana dipake buat perbuatan anonoh lagi. bisa dikenakan pasal tuduhan pencemaran nama baik, perbuatan tidak menyenangkan sama pencabulan di muke umum tu. iye, MUKE. hehehehe...

hmmmm segitu dulu dari saia yang sedang gundah gulana guligulindang. kalo kata Bunga sih, jangan biarkan kami mengambang seperti ini duonghh... iya, digantung tu emang gak enak. cruts!

*blub-blub-blub-blub-blub???? BLUBBBB!!!*

udah lama nggak narsis narcosis akhirnya keluar juga poto diri yah ehehehehehe. macam awak Starfleet USS Enterprise yang kelelep tak? keliatannya aja gaya, ngasih tanda "OK" di jari. padahal sebenernya setengah panik mask-clearing belom bener. perhatikan goggle saya, masih ada sisa air di dalemnya dan bikin perih mata. lalu perhatikan mata saya. perhatikan mata saya dalam dalam... apakah anda melihat bayangan hiu hitam di sana? hmm, tidak??? ya memang ini bukan poto 3D yang model begitu cari di Gramedia aja sanah... =p

for more of these stuff, click here... all underwater pics are taken by bang Igor, herder kesayangan abad ini... wooof-wooof-wooof!! ^___^;v

*kemarin malam, sepulang ngantor, di Plaza Senayan*

moron : gue lapar gue lapar gue lapar
gue : ya udah cepet pesen gue juga udah laper nihhh
moron : tapi gue maunya makan sup, di sini katanya supnya nggak enak

*keluar Victoria Cafe, naik elevator ke lt. 3 dengan niat menuju Oh-La-La*

gue : hei Wendy's menarik nih lebi murah lagi *secara gue tongpes*
moron : tapi ngga ada sup
gue : yoh wes, Oh-La-La then
moron : ei
gue : huh?
moron : Duta Suara dulu yuk!
gue : kampret @n^%^&^(^(#!-^&(^#$(^(!#, katanya laper lu?? ayokkk!!!

susah emang jalan sama perempuan plin plan. nggak punya duit, banyak utang, ngirit makan. tapi lemah godaan menghadapi CD *sigh*. dan gue baru nyadar bahwa gue punya kebiasaan untuk ngebrowse section OST dulu sebelum pindah ke mana mana. and guess what, kemaren gue nemu HARTA KARUN yaitu OST Beautiful Girls! kyaaaaaa....! ini pilem udah lama banget, dari jaman gue nyewa di rental Laser Disc. ampe sekarang gue belum nemu orang yang juga suka pilem ini. makanya gue kaget banget bisa ada di toko, secara pilem 10 tahunan lalu dan bukan tipikal blockbuster. tinggal OST Moonlight and Valentino doang yang gue harus dapetin dan gue bisa mati dengan tenang.

meanwhile hidup gue nggak tenang karena spend CD setara dengan sebuah day-trip. dan gue bingung bayar tagihan bulanan secara harus dicicil. ya mampus.

moron : hey look what i got! *sambil ngacung2in ini*
gue : monyet! ada lagi gak? *muka ngiri manyun bebek*
moron : tinggal satu... and it's miiinee! *joget dayak*

bah! fyi, ini satu satunya yang mengikatkan kita pas jaman SMA. buset deh, ada yang gambar logo SP+love di buku tahunan gue gitu si... =p

*****

i was happy-but-cranky, excited-but-anxious yesterday. makanya nggak karu karuan. see, when i'm in that kind of mood swing, i literally become an impulsive buyer. and that's not good. pernah waktu itu juga spend on snacks for half-mill, gue rasa cukup buat ngempanin anak TK satu kecamatan. or bought stacks of Friends' VCD yg udah gue tonton, just because. well, sebenernya ini sih yang paling parah dari gue kalau mengenai DVD/VCD : beli yang udah ditonton karena pengen koleksi. yang kadang gue juga ngga tonton lagi, but the thought that i have them on my shelf and can easily watch them whenever i want made me buy them. tolol, i know.

and then on CDs. i'm a sucker about this, i might say it too many times. di kamar gue udah ada 5 biji rak CD-susun-tiga bikinan Lion Star dan udah mulai penuh. plus satu tower CD isi 75. belum sekitar 40+ CD yang gue harus ambil dari rumah Depok. suatu hari kalo gue punya rumah sendiri, gue mesti designated satu kamar buat tempat buku, movie dan records gue. that will be my shrine. so far, CD dikelompokkan menurut jenis penyanyi dan album : OST - Female Vocalist - Group - Indonesian - Japanese. geeky, i know.

anyway, where was i? right, about being anxious. intinya, gue bisa gampang belanja yang ngga penting, huhuhu. apart from that, i tend to snack. a lot. which is not healthy. and make me fat. bullshit tu majalah perempuan, suruh ngemil yoghurt ama buah. that does not make me feel good, at all! i want fries, burgers, fried chicken, ice cream, chocolate, chips. you know, the real thing. which i had last night, from McDonalds. screw with Super Size Me, i want my comfort food!

ya gitu deh, amukan gue hari ini. sorry yah, lagi shallow secara nyaris nervous breakdown. hehehehe.

you know there are fours words i need to hear before i go to sleep. four little words. "good night, sweet girl." that's all it takes. i'm easy, i know, but a guy who can muster up those four words is a guy i want to stay with. - Andera (Uma Thurman), Beautiful Girls

ps: oiya, kita akhirnya nggak jadi ke Oh La La dan makan sup. moron malah makan waffle fries + chillis nya Wendy's. gue makan paket nasi dan es grim cone McD. perempuan plin plan. susah emang.

it's rolling so fast within a blink of an eye. yes, i want it. so bad. please let it come towards my pathway. dear god, hear me out and grant this wish. dear friends, pray hard for me, will you?

pedih ini tak mau pergi
luka ini sungguh menyayat hati
wajahnya terbayang
dan melayang
di langit kamarku
pergi dulu

** di banyak pilihan
aku memilihmu
kesalahan indah
dan kini terjebak
sendiri terpaku
kesalahan
indah

pergi pergilah air mata
takkan lama berada di dalam
luka berkepanjangan ini
tiada pantas untuknya
ku tersenyum
karena

back to **

Kesalahan Indah - Sarah

woi moron kampret, bayar royalti luh!!!
*nyengir perih*

it's only 2 weeks from new year -or 5 days from my so-called vacation- and i'm already suffocated with life. *grumble*. god, i really need to tone down my social life nowdays. got back at 10+ on daily basis, my body is this close to talk back : fuck you, i need a goddamn break! alrite alrite, i hear you.

anyway, yesterday i managed to pamper this pitiful body of mine for a nice massage and bodyscrub. a persuasive attempt to make it bear with me since i'll be abusing it. or more. which i'm not sure it would work.

my work schedule will be shifted 1.5 hrs for the next 2 weeks, adjusting to India's time. don't ask why, a soldier -or jedi- has to do her battle. it's a dirty job, but somebody gotta do it. especially when your general -or admiral; or superman; or whatever- is out on national service. hence, this will be a guerilla war -not radio-. so mortals, prepare for combat!

on a lighter side, this weekend i'm opt to another dive in Sepa. yeah, you guys might be oblivious with my dive dive dive lunacy. and still doing it, while i know i'll be busting my arse to pieces afterwards. ahhh ,bite me. it's not a matter of bad time management *self-defense mode:on*. though i'm not in prime condition, i really need it to test the water -uh, actually i want to try my new suit-. especially for my forthcoming CNY dive trip down to Maumere next month. 5 days of living on-board, nothing but eat-dive-drink-dive-weeds-dive-dive-dive. oh yes, just imagining it gave me orgasm, baby. plus, i'd say it will be a well deserved holiday. dontcha think?

updated at 01/14/05, 09:17
new year deserves new layout. so here you go. hopefully this looks good whether you're browsing with IE, NC or MF. the latest is my current favorite, just so you know... ;)

let me sing you a waltz
out of nowhere
out of my thoughts
let me sing you a waltz
about this one night stand

you were for me that night
everything i always dreamt of in life
but now you're gone
you are far gone
all the way to your island of rain

it was for you just a one night thing
but you were much more to me
just so you know

i hear rumors about you
about all the bad things you do
but when we were together alone
you didn't seem like a player at all

i don't care what they say
i know what you meant for me that day
i just wanted another try
i just wanted another night

even if it doesn't seem quite right
you meant for me much more
than anyone i've met before
one single night with you little Jesse
is worth a thousand with anybody

i have no bitterness, my sweet
i'll never forget this one night thing
even tomorrow, another arms
my heart will stay yours until i die

let me sing you a waltz
out of nowhere
out of my blues
let me sing you a waltz
about this lovely one night stand

A Waltz For a Night - Julie Delpy

dear 'Jesse',
thanks for your original Before Sunrise VCD. it is my most prized movie collection. worry not for it's in a good hand, dear. i'm not much of a waltz singer, let alone composer * well, at least i tried... and sucks*. so this one goes to you, dear. each and every word of it.

'Celine'.

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
banyak juga nih. bikin keramik, gigs pertama, tapi yang paling menyenangkan adalah open water diving! :)

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, & will you make more for next year?
did i have any? secara catetan gue sih nggak ada, ye... masalah kerjaan juga masih mandeg gini gini aja... so no, i didn't keep my resolution (if there's any)... tetapi i kept my word on learning new things every year... :D

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Joice had a birth, but unfortunately... well, Jibran sama Aria lahirnya tahun ini juga...

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Pakde Sur...

5. What countries did you visit?
Singapore doang... but technically i was in Barcelona last new year, plus a 2 hrs transit in Frankfurt... so i may add Spain and Germany... =p

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
kerjaan yang lebih bagus, hidup yang lebih bahagia, berwarna dan menyenangkan, otak kanan yang lebih berfungsi dan yang jelas, duit yang lebih banyak... i know, sounds matre but i really need more money... liat jidat gue, ada stiker BU, nih... Butuh Uang... huhuhuhuhu...

7. What date from 2004 will remain attached upon your memory, why?
30 January, 1 May, 25 July, 18 September *well, basically the whole September was a memorable one*, 13 October, 29 November... can't say the reasons here, all waaaay to personal but you guys might have guess for some dates... ;)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
nekat nyoba banyak hal baru, whether it's self-driven or chatartic. terutama mulai paruh tahun terakhir, hidup gue agaknya berwarna... SANGAT berwarna... plus, i'm so proud about the diving thingy... ehehehe...

9. What was your biggest failure?
losing control on lot of things... proyek rugi yang ternyata cukup devastating... i lost my sense and sensibility too much and it cost quite a lot... but at the end of the day, i didn't regret a single thing... *chin up*

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
gigi gue... GIGI GUEEEEEEE!!! satu satunya hal yang membuat gue menderita... sama gampang sakit 4 bulan terakhir ini... yoosh, mari tingkatkan stamina bersama! ^___^;v

11. What was the best thing you bought?
DVD player, cable modem, diving gears, Paloma *yang secaranya punya bokap tapi daku turut mengelusnya dengan penuh cinta*

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
geng kacamata (selpi, dinana, ndun, ika*akhirnya ketularan juga!*) teman bersuka ria terutama pas ada yang colongan pulang... my diving sisters (lita-miwa-dita) dan dua peliharaan baru yang aduuuh lutuna, seminggu nggak akan lengkap tanpa kehadiran kelian...

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
secaranya kehidupan peribadi saia tak mau komentar... secaranya pekerjaan masih orang orang yang sama yang gemar menyiksa... secaranya kawan mereka baik baik belaka kok... :)

14. Where did most of your money go?
short-trips, diving, benerin gigi, the usual books-dvds-cds *lingkaran setan*

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
jelas diving trip sama gig... maklum, secara 22nya masih perawan gitu loh... ;)

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
Sweetest Goodbye - Maroon 5
She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Misread - Kings of Convenience
November Rain - Guns n' Roses
Sweet Surender - Sarah Mc Lachlan
I Can't Make You Love Me - George Michael
lagu lagunya si moron...

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?
indifferent, too much leaps of emotion and mood swings... it had been a tremendous roller coaster ride for me, i'm so close to puke all over you... :D
ii. thinner or fatter?
fatter on first half, thinner in second half... i shed 4 kilos and intended to shed another 4... ;)
iii. richer or poorer?
definately poorer... too much on doodles, not to mention spending out on initial costs on expensive hobby... but hey, if you need more, you gotta get more... iye gak?? =p

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
saving *which was not possible at all* spending more time for myself, punya akal sehat buat dipakai *so much for being sakit jiwa*

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
arguing (over simple matters), drinking alcohol and smoking, do stupid things, belanja yang nggak penting

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
not celebrating any christmas, but ended up having good time over sushi & plum wines and karaoke with my diving sisters and some mutual girlfriends... dan stoking abu abu plus tisyu itu, aduhhh...

21. Did you fall in love in 2004?
should i answer this?

22. How many one-night stands?
should i REALLY answer this? *pengsan ah*

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Coupling, CSI, Goodness Gracious Me, Everybody Loves Raymond

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
can't seems to recall... i'm not much of a hater, i hate hating people... kalopun ada kecewa kecewanya sama orang, lupain aja lah... eh, ngelupain nggak berarti benci kan ya?

25. What was the best book you read?
Unbearable Lightness of Being nya Kundera... kalo Da Vinci Code, bacanya seru banget tapi ujungnya macam orgasme digantung, huhuhuhu... sama Kok Putusin Gue nya Ninit deh, ada paperback comment dari gue soalnya... kyaaaaa! ^^;v

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
secaranya gue keju busuk akut, jadi bayangkan saja temuannya macam apa... uhuhuhuhu... this year, i'm more into Kings of Convenience, Belle & Sebastian, Stereolab stuff gitu... lebih suka yang akustik, eerie atau mellow, feel-good sounds lah... tapi sepertinya akan ada pergeseran lagi awal tahun baru, see how it affects my right brain *if any... i mean: brain...* :D

27. What did you want and get?
none and a lot...

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Before Sunset, It's All About Love, Spider-Man 2, LOTR : ROTK

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
turned 27.... nggak ngapa2in, i didn't even recall having any dinner...

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
if i can only kept a clearer mind... dang! sama suatu kesempatan yang gue lewatkan, moga moga tahun ini nggak lewat lagi...

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
i always wear comfy stuff : whatever i want to wear, whenever i want to wear... tapi tahun ini gue pake banyak warna pink, putih ama item... and i bought too much lingeries, all kinds of them... ehehehe

32. What kept you sane?
other than the fact that i have to function well to pay the bill? none... or maybe senor Jose Cuervo and Jinro-kun... oiya, mungkin an ever fixed kantong muntah juga yah...

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Joaquin Phoenix *that oh-irresistable-bangsat look!*, and the return of Ethan Hawke *cold-artiste as usual... damn, if only looks could kill!*... as for musician, gue agak kepincut sama Jack White nya The White Stripes... he has 'it', the certain thing that turn me on... tapi kok makin lama makin ndut yah? ;)

35. Who did you miss?
someone i lost along the way... eventually we kept in touch, but not as intense as it used to... the fact that i gotta gave you up because i screwed up -big time- kills me inside... hey you, you are missed... a lot...

36. Who was the best new person you met?
my diving sisters and the whole crowd *panda ama herder yg debes!*, orang orang yang gue temui akibat otak kanan yang nyala-mati, temen baru yang mampir di sini...

**diambil dari Friendster. i know, tahun baru kok malas betul...

all in all it was a good visit. 25 books from Borders *fortified with LOTR collector's set, Life of Pi, Eva Luna, The Namesakes, Mitch Albom, Alexander McCall Smith and Mike Gayle series*, 7 CDs from Gramophone *including Coltrane, Chet Baker, Jaco's Words of Mouth, RATM and OST Before Sunrise/Before Sunset*, dive gears *Bare's wetsuit, diver's log book organizer and dive traveller bag*, a bit of clothing and lingeries, et al. not to mention meeting up with some friends over drinks *JC tequila, Choya umeshu and Wolf Blass chardonnay* and dinner *lovely chilli crab at Kallang, duck rice, roti prata and chicken cutlet*. thanks for those who manage to squeeze some time to catch up with me, despite of their busy everyday life. it was also a pleasure to meet new friends *and a master scuba dive instructor*, hope we could meet *and dive together* again in the near future. will tell you more when i touch base in like... uhhh, 3 hrs from now. ciao! ;)